August 3, 2023
Principle 8. Comprehended Action. Week 2
You Will Make Your Conflicts Disappear When You Understand Them In Their Ultimate Root, Not When You Want To Resolve Them
Last time: Tale of a Blanket.
This time: Conflicts and Contradictions
This Week:
At our next meeting we will continue our interchange about principle 8 from chapter 13 of the book (The Inner Look by Silo). Last week we looked at this principle of valid action in general terms trying to get a sense of its overall structure and implications. This week we consider it in the light of past experience.
Personal Reflections:
Here are some personal reflections, both my own, and those of friends. While I’ve doubtless changed their words, I hope I’ve been true to their intent. I offer these considerations in the spirit of dialogue and exchange, and look forward to hearing your thoughts about, and experiences with, this principle,
At Our Last Meeting.
Many people participated in our interchange on Wednesday. Here’s a partial sample drawn from that dynamic conversation.
At our last meeting Flavio mentioned how he found the story of the shepherd and the blanket (see last week’s our note) helpful in understanding this principle.
Roberto mentioned that he could see this principle at work in retrospect i.e. looking back at situations that had already passed. I think in our conversation we all agreed that even this can prove very difficult, because of old ideas and beliefs that may not apply to the current situation. Karina noted that these beliefs were often rooted in our landscape of formation. Cristian pointed out that our anxiety about resolving a situation was often precisely what made it difficult to see what was really involved.
Victor raised the question point that applying principle seems to involve contemplation and wondered if there wasn’t a way to recognize the real causes of a conflict in the moment. Flavio told us of an experience where he had someone speak out against the tendency to blame a certain group for the world’s problems, only to advocate blaming a different group. Unfortunately, when you think about it, that doesn’t seem to be unusual behaviour.
Perhaps given the average age of our participants it wasn’t surprising that many examples were put forth about conflicts arising between parents and children. It was noted that these were often because of an inability, or refusal, to see those children as autonomous individuals. Boldy even shared an example where recognizing this behavior led him to speak to his children about it. The result was a powerful, emotional moment of reconciliation.
Chris drew our attention to an interesting parallel with the image of the blanket that Flavio mentioned at the beginning of this discussion. This appears in Silo’s comments where he draws an analogy to our current crisis and someone feeling choked by clothes they’ve outgrown.
This discussion appears in Silo: Sage of the Andes, and also in the “Transmission” titled The Experience http://www.silo.net/en/present_transmission/index/2
Returning to this week’s focus.
Can I recall a situation where I tried to resolve a problem that I didn’t really understand? How did that go? Did I stumble on a solution through blind luck, or did my actions make things worse?
Can I recall a situation where I was able to delay acting until I had a better grasp on the roots of the problem? Did those insights help?
If I can’t recall such things in regard to my own actions, can I recall how this principle impacted the situation of others (real or imagined)? From Oedipus to TV situation comedies many of our great myths, stories and popular entertainments revolve around situations where the roots of the conflict are misunderstood, or where the conflict arises from a mistaken belief or perception.
Conflicts are not really hard to find.
It’s not only that I recognize conflicts between myself and others — conflicts about values, things we want to do, money, etc. Some of these are substantial, most (one hopes) are trivial. I also find internal conflicts of varying degrees of seriousness. Most notable among these are perhaps the contradictions between what I think, what I feel and what I end up doing. When we talk about contradiction we are pointing to a certain kind of conflict. Not all conflicts are contradictions. The principles are principles of valid action a powerful medicine that dissolves the knots of conflict.
Some people see these principles as rules or laws. Others see them as tactics, or as a moral code. Some dismiss them as trivial platitudes.
There is a however a very different approach which involves understanding them as reminders that point us back to our own registers and our own direction in life. From this perspective their value is found in their function as signposts indicating the need, and the way, to move toward registers of internal unity and away from those of internal conflict.
However, as we’ve discussed previously, making them into something more than platitudes can only come about by engaging with them and trying to weave them into a style of life with which to face daily life.
Remember:
“A new life is not based upon destroying previous “sins” but upon recognizing them, so that from now on it will be clear how ill-advised are these mistakes.”
Silo_ The Internal Landscape lX:18
Worth Repeating:
“They don't want to give up these illusions because they believe that it's thanks to them that they can live. But finally those illusions fall, and you begin to feel more freedom than you would have imagined. So it is with the ideologies—many people believe that they need to have that ideology, because without it, well, what is there to live for? And it turns out that what that person has is a big illusion, as big as a house, and this is a problem because it distorts reality. So, I'm saying the world is changing, and that soon people are going to start letting go of their ideologies without too much difficulty, like clothing they’ve outgrown. And that's not because the human being is falling, or in decline... Quite the contrary, it's because the human being is growing, and these clothes are now too small, these ideologies no longer fit, people have outgrown these illusions. In this historical moment it's the growth of the human being that produces that sensation of asphyxiation. But we're doing fine, things are not so bad. But all this will take a little more time.”
Silo_ The Transmission: the experience.
Coming up:
Next week we will turn our focus to reflecting on this principle in the light of our present experiences.
Note:
Illustration by Rafael Edwards.
These notes have been posted on Facebook and sent to our email list, and, on my website www.dzuckerbrot.com
See you around.
